Wednesday, October 31, 2012

My Irrational Phobias

This is Halloween! Everybody make a scene! (Bonus points: name that movie.)

I figured that since today is Halloween, day of creepy awesomeness, I would tell you about some things that scare the bejesus out of me. Mind you, none of them are rational fears, but I think that makes it even more entertaining. Feel free to chime in with any of your own weird phobias. I bet none of us are alone.

The top of the list has always been SPIDERS. They're sneaky with their too many legs, and they always show up when I'm in the middle of breakfast or trying to take a shower. Or they're on the ceiling. This new house has a lot of ceiling spiders.


This necklace is pretty cute, though. I bet it's because it only has four legs.

Next, we have clowns. I've never liked them, even as a small child when I had to deal with them at birthday parties. And then I read It by Stephen King as a teenager and it was all downhill from there.


Send in the clowns? Only if you want to see me hyperventilate.

Adjacent to clowns we have porcelain dolls and marionettes. Maybe I'm just creeped out by things with painted faces? Whenever I stumble upon one in an antique mall, I feel like it's watching me.

(I don't even want to find a picture. Moving on...)

And finally, elephants. Not products that happen to have an elephant on them, I mean the actual animals themselves. In fact, I tend to like elephant figurines, pictures, etc., but if I have to be around a real one, I get nervous. I remember seeing some kind of zoo presentation in elementary school where the elephant keeper had the thing step on a watermelon and said, "It would do the same thing to your head!" Awesome. Phobia formed.


Tiny elephant, you're not scary. You're full of cuddles. Too bad they're not all like you.

So what phobias do you have? Anything kind of strange? (Admittedly, the elephant thing is totally wonkus.) Anybody afraid of Halloween? That would be a huge bummer. And speaking of the holiday, what do you have planned for tonight? I'll be gleefully handing out candy after class and then watching the finale of Face Off while eating the leftovers. Good times!

18 comments:

  1. Spiders are a perfectly rational phobia...I'm right there with you. In fact, listen to this one...
    I had to exchange some glassware that had a few flaws to my supplier. As I'm unloading the box, I see a spider...a rather large one. Not only am I embarrassed that I brought a spider into the store with me, I had to have the manager kill it for me...LOL! Then I completely freaked out because I realized I'd carried that box to the car...and it rode the 45 mins in the car with me to the store! I had goosebumps the whole way home!
    And at 29, I'm still afraid of the dark! I'm a wuss like that :)

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    1. Car spiders are the WORST! There's no escape! I'm afraid of a lot of bugs in general, and last night there was a centipede crawling up our curtains. Awesome. I made my husband come up from the basement to kill it.

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  2. I have an irrational phobia of face paint. It took everything in me to look at the pictures in your last post. Matt tried having me help him paint his face red to be a devil - I get sweaty palms, feel sick, and turn white - I couldn't do it. The Halloween Spirit stores also creep me out. I like Halloween, but not the gorey version of it.

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    1. Aww, Meg! You're such a trooper! Sorry I freaked you out. :-)

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  3. Oh my goodness, Paige, I wouldn't even know where to start...I might be typing all day. Actually, I got an email from WebMD (I keep trying to unsubscribe from them, but there are like 18 different WebMD email lists or something!) and it listed the top ten most common phobias, plus a bunch of other ones. I was like checking them off..."yep that's me. And that one. And that one too. Ok, I should just stop reading this now." Haha.

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  4. I don't think this list is irrational at all. I mean who ISN'T afraid of spiders (some are poisonous!), clowns, or being stomped on by a giant elephant?

    lol

    I wish I wasn't afraid of heights, but I think most of us are born with that fear too.

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  5. "This is Halloween/Everybody make a scene" totally Nightmare Before Christmas, a classic! I have a phobia of lizards, weird right? I think it stems similarly from other people fear of spiders: they're fast and sneaky, but the scariest thing about lizards is that they are dumb! Half the time they try to run away and end up on top of my feet. Horror story to me!

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  6. I totally agree with you about the dolls! I never had dolls as a kid (maybe a barbie) I think they stare at you all creepy. The eyes follow you.
    Plus side, I bet those expensive dolls people bought me as a kid that I never took out of the box are worth some money today!

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  7. I'm with you on the spiders! Take or leave clowns, but I love Nellies!
    Di
    x

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  8. I'm with you on the antique porcelain dolls. Shudder. I also don't like old elevators. If I got caught in one of those, I'd lose it beyond repair.

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  9. I am not a big fan of clowns or spiders either. One of the downsides to living in a house with a basement is the spiders.

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  10. I have an irrational fear of sloths. I know they are so slow they won't hurt me, but they're so creepy and slow! and mold grows in their fur. and those long nails. eeeewwwww I'm scared just thinking of it.

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  11. My best friend hates spiders so being the awesome person that I am I sent her a Halloween card with a cute kitten on it and then I included a big black tarantula in the package. I later got a text saying she wasn't friends with me anymore. She didn't even take the spider out of the package. She just threw it away. hilarious! Anyway, I think "IT" ruined kids born in the 80s with clowns. I was pretty traumatized by that movie. I can't stand rats or rat-looking animals like possums. Possums to me are just gigantic rats that can hang from their tails.

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  12. I am absolutely TERRIFIED of spiders. The other night a spider was by the couch and I couldn't find anyone to kill it. I was about to cry! It is just irrational how afraid I am of them.

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    Jessica @ Sunny Days and Starry Nights

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  13. I don't like spiders, either. Neither does the hubs, actually, which makes it pretty interesting as to who has to kill the spider in the house. Because you have to kill it, and keep an eye on it while you get a kleenex, or else it will disappear and freak you out even more when you don't know where it went.

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  14. I'm with you, I hate spiders of any kind. Actually I hate most bugs. I also have a fear of a stranger looking through my windows. When it gets dark I close all the curtains, I hate feeling that someone can see in my house and I can't see out because it's to dark. Way to many scary movies when I was younger:)
    Valerie
    Everyday Inspired

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